This is a site devoted to 'dinosaurs and their biscuits'. Every good vertebrate palaeontologist knows that dinosaurs had a taste for cookies. In fact, we now know that dinosaurs' diet consisted of 100% biscuits. This may at first seem to challenge palaeontological dogma, but the evidence has become undeniable. Furthermore, dinosaurs did not eat biscuits randomly; a custard cream here or a hob-nob there. No, they were picky. If a particular species of dinosaur didn't have its preferred tea-time snack it would undoubtedly go ape. Similar correlations between prehistoric animals and confectionary are found elsewhere in the fossil record. For example, both the flying pterosaurs and swimming reptiles of long ago have been found associated with various teatime treats and sweet snacks.It is now known throughout the scientific community that the dinosaur-biscuit correlation was more than mere preference; each species of dinosaur became dependent upon a particular biscuit. This factor, although at first highly advantageous, eventually led to the demise of a large number of dinosaurian groups. These prehistoric facts are only now coming to light in this age of cutting edge discovery and open-minded enthusiasm.
The Evidence
1. The fossils of dinosaurs and their biscuits are abundant in rock strata, and some of these deposits are thousands of years old. The famous Rich Tea Formation of Macaroon town, Morocco, and the less well known Jammie Dodger beds of Mcvitiesville, France, are typical examples of such strata.2. Particular dinosaur genera and specific biscuits are always found in direct association as fossils, often in death assemblages. One Iguanodon specimen from the Isle Of Wight, UK, is fossilised with a bourbon biscuit in its hand. The skeletons of a herd of Euoplocephalus were found fossilised surrounding the remains of a choc-chip cookie. Perhaps the herd were tempted into a bog by the cookie, or the dinosaurs died in the fight for the single goody.
3. The teeth of each dinosaur are adapted for its unique diet. The dentition of specific genera is so specialised that even if they decided to eat something other than their associated biscuit, they would be unable to cope. It would be like feeding a toffee apple to a giraffe, or gravel to a monkey.
4. The resemblance between biscuits and dinosaurs is uncanny in some cases. I once mistook my 'Jurassic Park' Stegosaurus toy for a pink wafer. Imagine my surprise when I realised after two tasty bites that it was plastic and not a biscuit at all!
5. Very rare discoveries overshadow any doubt. These include biscuit packets unearthed from Jurassic sediments, and ancient dinosaur artwork preserved on prehistoric papyrus.
